The Dark Knight Rises (2012) A Casual Review

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I remember being so excited to go and see this film.  It was going to be Epic, and legendary.  The final battle between good and evil if you will.  I booked my tickets a day in advance and because Debz and myself are cheap we brought our own popcorn and drinks with us because at our cinema’s they seriously over charge you.

We walked into the cinema, found our seats and made small talk waiting for this piece of Hollywood history to finally unfold.  Everything went dark and the Warner Brothers logo appeared, followed by DC.  I had goosebumps.

But nothing could prepare me for this.  About half an hour in i noticed that the score in the background had not changed since the film started and everyone was still talking but they were all so miserable.  forty five minutes in an action scene sprung upon us like a drunken bat in the night.  I couldn’t even describe it to you if I tried.  It was really forgetful.

This film was so………….borrrrriiiinnnnnngggggg on so many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many levels.  Not to mention it didn’t make sense or that could be because i fell asleep.  All the characters from Bruce Wayne to Bane were so uninteresting.  Everybody was so sad and pissed off that i wonder why nobody actually killed themselves on set.  Bruce Wayne is such a cry baby in this film and Cat Woman is just a waste of space.  Bane was intimidating I’ll give you that but unfortunately he lost all street cred when started speaking and sounded like a a cheap Darth Vader knock off with a broken microphone.  I couldn’t  understand anything this guy was saying.  Through out the whole movie I was forced to try and concentrate on what he was saying which is completely the opposite of what a movie should be doing for you.

Spoiler Below

How the hell did Batman get stabbed at the end? He’s  wearing the bat suit for heavens sake.  He takes out guys with guns all the time, stabbing him should not have been an option.  It doesn’t seem possible.  Then Ras al Ghuls (Not the right spelling) daughter shows up being one of the baddies, has like twenty minutes of screen time and then dies.  What the Fuck?  Why was she in there in the first place?

And then there is the end, oh god the end is such a cliche and douche ending i couldn’t believe it.  Batman should have died.

I’ve read countless good reviews for this movie and I’m in no way bashing their opinion but I don’t  see how anyone could have enjoyed this.  What did you guys see that myself and Debz didn’t?  I’m seriously asking whoever reads this to please put a comment down because I am trying to understand.

When Debz and I left we both felt violated and extremely disappointed at a supposed Christopher Nolan master piece.  Do I blame the studio?  Do i blame Chris?

I don’t even care anymore…snore

 

 

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